Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Jessica available (again)

The Internets are abuzz that actress Jessica Simpson and Cowboys quaterback Tony Romo have broken up. This is good news because it makes Romo less distracted and therefore more valuable in fantasy football.

It also reminds me of this posting from the early days of the NaturalBlog, back before I was totally mailing it in. Enjoy a walk down memory lane with me.



Jessica, please stop calling
(Nov. 24, 2005)


Well, here we go again. Phone calls at all hours of the night. Love letters left on my doorstep, their I's dotted with little hearts. Oblique references to our relationship in songs that sniff the Top 40.

Jessica Simpson is
available again. And she's after me.

We've been down this road before. Jennifer, Lindsay, Angelina -- they've all sought sweet solace in my arms. But Jessica, she's in a class by herself. Tenacious with a capital T.

Don't get me wrong. She's great, really, but I just can't keep up with her. All she wants to do is play chess, visit art museums, read policy papers. That girl has needs, and they're all the intellectual kind. Not that I condone it, but no wonder Nick turned to strippers.

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