Thursday, January 05, 2006

Damon v. Benson

Who puts the hot in the hot stove league? Damon and Benson, Benson and Damon. No, not Yankees centerfielder Johnny Damon and Mets pitcher Kris Benson, but their wives Anna Benson (tattoed on the left) and Michelle Damon (inexplicably wearing white, below at right).

They're sharing the New York stage, thanks to Johnny's free agent signing with the Yanks earlier this offseason. So one has to wonder -- whose star will shine brighter?

I think it's pretty clear Michelle will need a few tricks up her sleeve (if she's wearing one) if she's going to compete with Anna. Not unlike the way New York eclipses Boston is almost every measurable way, Anna clearly offers more to sad lonely sports writers looking for a pretty face and screaming headline.

Witness: One of the reasons Damon reportedly wanted out of Boston was that Michelle was the subject of nasty rumors that she used to be a stripper. Benson does that one better -- she posed in Penthouse and is in negotiations with Playboy. (Shouldn't it be the other order?)

Michelle promised to give a fair shake to members of her husband's team whom she interviewed for her gig as a NESN reporter. Anna promised to sleep with her husband's teammates if he ever cheated on her. ("Even the batboy," she told Howard Stern.)

Michelle told The Boston Globe she uses money from Johnny's contract to buy houses, then turn them around at a profit. Anna told The Daily News she would want money her husband gave to 9/11 charities back if he were traded, as was rumored earlier this season.

I'm just hoping the Mets don't trade the Bensons before Anna has a chance to sit down with Michelle and show her how things are done in the Big Apple.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Point of Order here - ever since Bob Guccione resigned as chairman and CEO of Penthouse International, Inc. (November 8th, 2003 was a very sad day) Penthouse has not been the same. In fact, most every "men's magazine connoisseur" would tell you that there is little-to-no difference between Playboy and Penthouse now.

Errr - that's just what I have heard. I wouldn't know these things personally.

January 05, 2006  
Anonymous K-Don said...

This blog entry would be a lot funnier in wingdings.

January 05, 2006  
Anonymous Sebastian Dangerfield said...

Are the Metropolitans accepting applications for batboys?

January 05, 2006  

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