Thursday, March 22, 2007

People I Like Inexplicably, Vol. V

Two words here: John Mayer.

I've tried with all my might to dislike this guy. I really have. The hair. The fact that Esquire gave him a column. The fact that he dated Jessica Simpson, dumped her, now dates her again.

But even given all of these things, I've always kind of liked him. Maybe it's because my old roommate told me that Mayer once gave her a ride home, way back when he was playing Atlanta Barnes & Noble bookstores for free.

I started to really come around on the guy when he showed up on the Dave Chappelle Show to help Dave explain why white people love guitar. ("Play the fight riff, John!")

And I finally decided to include him in the People I Like Inexplicably pantheon after hearing an interview where he pretty much made fun of himself the whole time. Talking about his song Waiting on the World to Change, he summarized the message of the song by spoofing his own lyrics:
"Hey dude, on your own time/on your own dime/look up some stuff/but don't think it's cause I told you to."
He also worried that he might say something in the interview to give bloggers fodder for making fun of him. Not so, my friend. I'm on your side. It's my commenters who will probably let you have it.

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Blogger Sebastian Dangerfield said...

John Mayer? John Fucking Mayer? Could he sing in a voice that sounds any more fake? Could he write lyrics that sound any more insipid?

His music sounds the way fecal matter smells. He sucks so much that he threatens hookers’ job security.

And the assclown writes for Esquire? Shit, as if my already much besmirched industry weren’t tarnished enough.

Sebastian Dangerfield, Esq.

(not a fan)

March 22, 2007  
Anonymous Meredyth R. said...

Siiiiiiiigh. I always refer to him as the future Mr. Meredyth R. Waterman. Go ahead and toss your barbs, sebastian dangerfield, whoever you are. John Mayer is dreamy. I love him in the same ways that I love Hershey's chocolate, sleeping late on rainy mornings and Buddy Cianci. I'm too lost in sweet thoughts of him that I can't come up with any clever putdowns for you, dangerfield, and I don't much care. Aaaaaaahhhhhhh. John Mayer.

March 22, 2007  
Blogger Sebastian Dangerfield said...

I'm Batman.

(and a big, big Cianci fan, for the record)

March 23, 2007  

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