Friday, October 02, 2009

This qualifies as news

Here's a check on your Friday morning headlines.

King of Pop's BMI a healthy 20.1
. Michael Jackson's autopsy is out and the headline is that he's in good health. I don't know if I believe it, because that assessment comes from the same people who say 136 pounds on his 5'9" frame is just fine. The autopsy also noted he was balding.

Splendid Splinter splintered. The greatest hitter who ever lived, Ted Williams, is said to not be resting in peace. You may remember that Williams' head is cryogenically frozen in Arizona. A new book says someone took batting practice with it, sending "tiny pieces of frozen head" flying. Williams is the last player to 1) hit above .400 for a season and 2) have his head cryogenically frozen.

What the.... ?. The Wisconsin Tourism Federation has changed its name because its initials were WTF. It is now the Tourism Federation of Wisconsin. What do you expect from a place that has a "Recombobulation area in an airport.



Blogger Jerry Zezima said...

If you put Ted Williams and Michael Jackson together, he'd be the Splendid King of Popsicle. Talk about recombobulation.

October 02, 2009  
Anonymous Kevin said...

Starting my morning off right with these nuggets

October 02, 2009  
Anonymous nakedmac said...

Wisconsin is also changing its tourism slogan, eliminating "Live like you mean it!"

Some possible replacement slogans:

Live like you're unemployed!
Live like you don't need a forklift to get out of bed!
Live like you're not listed on an Internet sexual offender locator map!
And, of course, Come smell our dairy air!

October 04, 2009  
Anonymous Magaza said...


October 06, 2009  

Post a Comment

<< Home