Sunday, March 19, 2006

What daytime TV commercials say about people who watch daytime TV

They are homeowners who need cash now.

They or their partners are interested in natural male enhancement.

They have more than a passing interest in knowing that the average funeral now costs more than $6,000.

They are in the recruiting pool for the Army, Navy, and Marines -- but curiously not the Air Force.

They have mesothelioma and need attorney Jim Sokolove, or perhaps attorney Dane Shulman, to help them prove they got it from exposure to asbestos.

If successful, they might get a structured settlement. In which case they might need J.G. Wentworth, who can get them cash now.

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Anonymous yer sister said...

They are interested in massage school.

March 19, 2006  
Anonymous Kevin said...

Some more additions from the news room:

They are concerned with having a healthy, happy cat who stays trim and active, even if they themselves do not.

They are also looking to buy incredibly powerful vaccuum cleaners.

And killing evil green bacteria that burrows beneath your toenails.

March 23, 2006  

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