If I were on The Price is Right...

If I were on The Price is Right, I would have fulfilled a lifelong dream.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would probably be surprised at how small the set is.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would probably be surprised at how trashy Barker's Beauties are.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would definitely bid just $1 more than somebody else on Contestants Row, because that's the kinda guy I am.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would wish I did the household grocery shopping, so I'd be better equipped to play a pricing game.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would love to play The Matterhorn.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would hate to play Plinko.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would tell Bob he should be spayed or neutered.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would want to win a Brand New Car!

If I were on The Price is Right, I would probably win a bedroom set.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would spin the big wheel backwards.

If I were on The Price is Right, I would overthink the Showcase Showdown and probably bid just "One Dollar, Bob."