Celebrities -- They're just like us

Some people think the rich are different, but I think they're the same as you and me. Just look:

They gain weight in prison. I could try and be funnier than the New York Post, but instead I'll steal their joke about Lil' Kim's release from jail: She turned into Big Kim.

Sometimes they forget to shave. Michelle Rodriguez is hot, and by hot I mean gross.

They wear shirts from my alma mater. Maxim said Jennifer Garner was the third hottest woman on earth in 2005, down from first in 2001. Ben Affleck's socks were voted ninth hottest this year.