Drunken News

You might think from the headline that this is news I came up with while I was drunk, but it's the other way around. It's news people made while they were drunk.

How about the fella who was busted for DUI -- while driving his friend to a DUI hearing. He's from Massachusetts, naturally, though it happened in New Hampshire. Here's a tip: Don't drive drunk to a courthouse. Just a bad idea.

Can you believe Jake the Snake is still wrestling? He was said to be drunk and high at a wrestling show in Ohio when he exposed his snake to the crowd. TMZ reports the story, which I found via a clever sports blog. To be honest with you, I'm a little shocked Jake the Snake is still alive.