News roundup

Life imitating art imitating life. Samuel L. Jackson's worst nightmare comes true: A (singular) snake on a (small) plane. But still: A snake on a plane!

No jokes are required here. You'll probably think I'm kidding when I tell you that two of the world's top-ranked chess players had a physical altercation over a hot Australian chess grandmistress. Danny Gormally (bot. right) attacked Levon Aronian (bot. left) in a Turin nightclub, over the affections Arianne Caoili (striking, center). I can't help but think of my favorite song from a musical, One Night in Bangkok.

Sixty percent of the time, it works every time. The Toronto Blue Jays are giving away samples of pitcher Gustavo Chacin's new cologne at a game later this month. Perhaps wisely, fans will get the vials on the way out of the stadium, lowering the risk of Sex Panther-esque incidents.